Tuesday, November 04, 2008

UAE ID CARDS

UAE - November 2008 - National Identity Card in the UAE - The Official Portal of Dubai Government

Introduction - Instead of having multiple identity cards like driving licences, work permits, employee cards, passports, e-cards, the UAE Federal Government created a single national identity card in April 2006, with in-built smart features including biometrics and advanced ID features that will eventually eliminate the need to carry multiple cards. At a later date, it can be used as a travel document within the GCC.

Emirates Identity Authority(EIDA), a federal government organization, has already rolled out the first phase and second phase of the national identity card, as part of a comprehensive three year plan to provide National ID cards to three categories: UAE nationals, GCC citizens living in UAE and other UAE residents.

Note - Registration is currently open for UAE nationals, GCC citizens working or residing in the UAE, expatriate government staff and professionals (anyone with a degree) in the private sector. EIDA has announced a deadline of December 31st 2008 for all of the above categories.

For registering your family, you must ensure that your child has his/her own passport. Maids/domestic staff in your household are not included and separate dates will be announced for their registration later.

Criteria & Validity - You must be either a UAE national, a GCC citizen working or residing in the UAE, or a UAE resident and above 15 years of age. The card is valid for lifetime for nationals (with renewal every five years) and validity for other residents depends on the validity of the visa. However, the same card can be used, once the residence visa is renewed.

Comments on the subject (with no pun intended in reference to the UAE ID card, for which we have already applied at a card issuing centre in Umm Al Quwain on November 3, 2008)....

It would be ideal if India too introduced a similar ID card as the one introduced in the United Arab Emirates, however, with a validity of 5 years, and renewable thereafter.

Considering a 1.2 Billion strong population in India, if the government charged each body a sum of Rs.1.00 each, a whooping Rs.1.2 Billion can be generated. That, however, is peanuts and a waste of time. Therefore, it would be better if the charges are levied as follows:-

Let's divide the 1.2 Billion strong population into two categories, i.e. 70% wealthy, and the rest 30% below the poverty line. The wealthy shall have to pay Rs.500.00 each for the ID card, and those below the lousy poverty line shall pay Rs.10.00 each. That's generating something like Rs. 420,000,000,000.00 from the wealthy, and Rs.3,600,000,000.00 from the poor respectively. Add that two figures, and we have a princely sum of Rs.423,600,000,000.00 (Rs.423.6 Billion) or USD 10,085,714,285.00 (USD 10.08 Billion).

And once that money is generated, the government of India will not fool around and pull the wool over our eyes through their henchmen, chamchas, and village officers, but instead, use it to eradicate poverty in India over the next 5 years. We would then have the people of Hindustan or Bharath below the poverty line having an upgraded status, i.e. "wealthy", which would mean that when the cards issued now are up for renewal after 5 years, the government of India would be in an enviable position of raising a mind-boggling sum of Rs.600,000,000,000.00 (Rs.600 Billion) or USD.14,285,714,285.00 (USD 14,2 Billion).

Howzat for a calculation ?

As you can see, our webmaster is a genious, and hence, you shalt not hesitate to vote for him when he is ready to contest an election in India in the not too distant future.

Further thoughts from our Webmaster on the proposed Indian ID Card:

In spite of the categorization as above for the Indian ID Card, and the charges envisaged against them, i.e. Rs.500.00 each for the "wealthy" and Rs.10.00 each for "people below the poverty line", a further categorization amongst the wealthy and the ID card fee structure for them can be made as follows:-

For the "wealthy"

Businessmen/women, Rs.10,000 each
Filmstars (not film actors), Rs.10,000 each
Sports personalities (cricketers only), Rs.10,000 each
Cabinet Ministers and their family members, Rs.5,000 each
Retired Ministers and their family members, Rs.3,000 each
Politicians in general and their family members, Rs.2,000 each
People who are or were employed in foreign countries as Managers, and their family members, Rs.1,500 each.

For "people below the poverty line"

Those who do not own any land in India can be exempted from making any payment, and the ID card shall be issued to them on a free of charge basis. This is no big deal since the monies generated from the further categorized category of "wealthy" would adequately compensate for that.

Notes - It must be noted that the people who are lucky to work as Managers (although most of these cretins cannot read or spell their own names right) in the United Arab Emirates and elsewhere in the world enjoy a lifestyle envied by people like our webmaster. To elaborate, a mediocre manager's perks in the U.A.E. translate to:

A basic salary (AED.13,000 or above per month), plus company provided accommodation, the registration costs thereof; electricity and water bill payments. A company provided car with petrol expenses. Comprehensive medical insurance cover for the Manager and his/her spouse. Payment of school fee for a maximum of three children. Yearly air-tickets for the Manager and family. Visa expenses for the family. Yearly bonus equivalent to 3 months' pay. Frequent, fully paid travel across the world in the name of business trips, and seminars. U.A.E. Natinal ID card fee payment for Manager and wife/husband. (Our webmaster fails to understand why the company pays for the wife's ID card - are the wives of managers contributing anything to the company's coffers? ). Grapevine has it that the companies will also provide puppies to the Managers and their wives to fondle when nothing else is to hand.

As one can see, with income as shown above, these managers find themselves in the best of all possible worlds, and therefore, it goes without saying that they can afford to pay a sum of Rs.1,500 each for the Indian ID card; much to the relief and amusement of the "people below the poverty line".

Our webmaster especially hates these top managers' frequent utterance of "only for the managers" slogan (what the heck, the sack and firing too?, which they eventually face if the target is not met, forecast not achieved, or the bottom line does not show up as expected by the Board of Directors or the company owners. The company owners and the Board of Directors, wake up and read your financials regularly, in order not to go bust along with the current financial crises across the globe). Therefore, their ID fee is raised to 1,500 each, as they can afford to pay from the monies they looted from their employers.

Upon recalculation of the funds generated based on the "further categorization" of "wealthy" above, the Government of India should look no further for paradise on earth. Paradise is exclusively for all Indians to enjoy, right there in India. Indiar is Paradise and no longer British.

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